Today i was sitting and i was thinking about all the things i have done wrong in my life. I was wondering if I have done enough good to overcome the amount of pain and suffering that I have caused in my life.I have come to the vague conclusion that I don’t think i will ever be able to over come this deficit
Am I pre destine to lead a life of suffering from the angst I have caused. I am ok with that if that is the way it is going to be. But I ask if there is any way for me to make amends please tell me and I will do so. I am not afraid of any consequences I may have coming to me. I ask only please let me see what good i can have so I have a goal I have a reason to do so , because if not than please just take me.
I am not afraid to die I am willing to do so , so that some good can come from a world without me. I know I am not a good person but I do try, I know i have been a thorn in the side of many but i never meant to do so I was only looking to try and fill a hole in my heart and in my soul that was left open by unloved and uncaring and an unloving life. I am not trying to cry poor me I am not trying to get some sort of affection, I am used to that and im ok with it, all I am trying to do is ask why do I feel like this all the time?
Why am I wanting to let my life go why do i want to just be done?
This is a question I am sure many have asked .Maybe one day when I have the chance I will ask the right person and he or she will tell me why and i may understand.
I know many who read this may say aww it is not so bad I have it worse, just remember don’t judge util you have walked a mile in my shoes.
I was thinking that I am no judge , I have no reason to forgive anyone, no one has ever done anything to me to hurt me intentionally, I am not one to be looking to forgive anyone, anything i have had done to me is a product of my own doing. I am ok with that now that I am able to see more clearly. I am sorry for all the pain I have caused to any one in my life it was never meant to be this way.
I am the one who should be asking for forgiveness for all the pain and suffering I have caused, please just remember this I never meant any malice, I was just trying to fill a hole.
sean2lovedee 
????
Today i was sitting and i was thinking about all the things i have done wrong in my life. I was wondering if I have done enough good to overcome the amount of pain and suffering that I have caused in my life.I have come to the vague conclusion that I don’t think i will ever be able to over come this deficit
Am I pre destine to lead a life of suffering from the angst I have caused. I am ok with that if that is the way it is going to be. But I ask if there is any way for me to make amends please tell me and I will do so. I am not afraid of any consequences I may have coming to me. I ask only please let me see what good i can have so I have a goal I have a reason to do so , because if not than please just take me.
I am not afraid to die I am willing to do so , so that some good can come from a world without me. I know I am not a good person but I do try, I know i have been a thorn in the side of many but i never meant to do so I was only looking to try and fill a hole in my heart and in my soul that was left open by unloved and uncaring and an unloving life. I am not trying to cry poor me I am not trying to get some sort of affection, I am used to that and im ok with it, all I am trying to do is ask why do I feel like this all the time?
Why am I wanting to let my life go why do i want to just be done?
This is a question I am sure many have asked .Maybe one day when I have the chance I will ask the right person and he or she will tell me why and i may understand.
I know many who read this may say aww it is not so bad I have it worse, just remember don’t judge util you have walked a mile in my shoes.
I was thinking that I am no judge , I have no reason to forgive anyone, no one has ever done anything to me to hurt me intentionally, I am not one to be looking to forgive anyone, anything i have had done to me is a product of my own doing. I am ok with that now that I am able to see more clearly. I am sorry for all the pain I have caused to any one in my life it was never meant to be this way.
I am the one who should be asking for forgiveness for all the pain and suffering I have caused, please just remember this I never meant any malice, I was just trying to fill a hole.
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Genesis.
Nothing special , Just a man with pain ,like most other people.
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